Full Term

Full term. Full term. Full term. I just love the sound of that! To me it means my baby is now safe. Ahh, he's safe. <3

I remember it like it was yesterday - no - an hour ago - seeing those two pink lines for the first time. My emotions went from defeat and sorrow to pure existential bliss. There was no way I was stopping the tears, or wiping that smile off my face. It's not a secret that Dan and I had trouble conceiving. I wasn't sure if we would ever be able to have a biological child - and this thought consumed me, but more than that, it crushed me. I will never forget those long wearing months of uncertainty and frustration, and I feel for anyone in a common situation. It is tough - be sensitive. You never know who may be going through it.

So here I sit, full term and just 3 weeks from my due date, with a BABY growing and twisting inside my belly. It still feels surreal at times. I haven't seen him yet, how does anyone really KNOW there is a baby in there? Maybe they put false ultrasound photos up on the screen to trick me - maybe I just went to Qdoba too many times. Seriously, these are REAL thoughts! I am going to be a MESS when I see my sons face for the first time. I will melt all over the hospital floor and they'll have to mop me up.

This whole experience has been a wave of emotions, but I wouldn't change where I am at in my life for anything. Many women are left to raise their children alone, whatever the situation. I am so fortunate to have a husband that's respectful, patient, selfless, loving, generous, and committed. He's SO excited to be a father, and that makes me even more excited to be a mother - and a family. I feel grateful to have such a wonderful man to raise children with. Yes children. We want two little nuggets!

So c'mon nugget number one, we are waiting patiently to kiss those cheeks. :)